In Honor of My Anniversary. . .

I think this perspective on monogamy is fascinating. . .

Who said monogamy was natural?

“Right-wing pro-family advocates are correct: Monogamy is definitely under siege,” said David Barash. But don’t blame radical feminists and gays, or Godless communists. “The culprit is our own biology.”

Researchers in animal behavior have long known that “monogamy is uncommon in the natural world,” and a growing body of research shows that “Homo sapiens carries all the evolutionary stigmata of a mildly polygamous mammal.” But before you take this as a permission slip to cheat on your spouse, remember that “natural isn’t necessarily good.” (Think of earthquakes or pneumonia.)

The point is, some of the most satisfying human accomplishments, from mastering the violin to scaling a mountain, don’t come naturally, but require dedication and hard work. “A case can be made, in fact, that people are being maximally human when they do things that contradict their biology.” For its part, monogamy can foster an ever deeper intimacy between partners, to say nothing of family stability.

“To be sure, monogamy isn’t easy; nor is it for everyone. But anyone who claims that he or she isn’t cut out for monogamy misses the point. No one is.”

(The Week Magazine, Wednesday, November 25, 2009)

And to think, I could have earned the same super-human status by learning to play the violin, but the last 19 years* wouldn't have been nearly as interesting.

*14 years of marriage